I Bleed Blue

It's finals week. Last push of the semester... here we go. One final complete, three to go. Strange during the most annoying week of the school year, I am missing BYU. Strange only because finals week at BYU would be far more torturous than here at PNC. Don't get me wrong, PNC is a good school, but... well it's a little bland here. I miss BYU's beautiful campus. The unique buildings. And most of all the diversity. There is NO diversity here. This is something I never minded growing up, actually I never noticed it. I didn't know any different. Something about BYU just feels like home. The likelihood of me returning is pretty much zero, but if I could rewind, I would never have left. I miss dancing in ROC (a multicultural dance group) as horrifying as it was for me. I was painfully shy during that time, but I can't deny it was an amazing experience. Some unforgettable memories were created during my time at BYU. It's hard not to look back. It will always be close to my heart, but I plan on creating many more exciting new memories. Hopefully those memories include traveling... hehe but we shall see!

Accepted!

Just thought I'd share my good news. I received my admissions letter from Valparaiso University, and I have been accepted into their accelerated nursing program beginning this May! I am still hoping to get into MUSC, but I'm just grateful I got accepted into a program period. Heavenly Father has truly blessed me. It still amazes me the outpouring of blessings I've been given despite my lack of deserving. I am humbled by His perfect love and the blessing of a continuous Atonement.

Tonight was the Christmas Devotional. I am grateful to have a living prophet to live and guide us. I often take for granted that we've been blessed with these inspired leaders. I've grown up in this gospel and tend to overlook these tremendous blessings because they have just become "the norm" for me. Where would I be without this truth? Someone would have me believe that I'd be more free. Free from the burden of the knowledge of truth. Free to do whatever I wanted without the guilt. He is incredibly persuasive and deception is his strength (understatement of the year). But is happiness living a lie? Is ignorance really bliss? No it isn't. Joy comes in following the perfect plan that has been laid before us by an all knowing Father in Heaven who wants nothing more than our happiness and for us to return Home. Truth does not restrict. Truth gives life. It opens doors that you would have never known existed, and behind those doors are blessings beyond what we could imagine. When we feel discouraged, let us not be quick to forget what we've been blessed with because of the truth.

Another Semester Down

Almost! In exactly 2 weeks I will be done with another semester of classes and finals. Hallelujah! It's feels like yesterday I just started classes. Though during some moments the days felt unbearably long, these past few months have flown by. My application has gone into Valparaiso University and I will be sending out my Medical University of South Carolina application in about a month. I'm mildly stressed out about getting accepted, but I know things will work out. Even if that means I get rejected from both schools, that just means there is another route for me to take. I will be extremely disappointed if I don't get accepted (preferably by MUSC), but such is life and I've experienced worse, and life goes on regardless.

I'm currently volunteering at the hospital. Tomorrow will be my 2nd day. So far it seems simple enough... I was slightly overwhelmed when they told me all the things I could be doing, not that it sounded difficult, but I wasn't sure I would remember all of it. I am probably over thinking it. I am volunteering in the ER. I make calls to discharge patients for half the time that I'm there and survey their experience, and the rest of the time I do hospitality type stuff, run specimen to lab, and I guess whatever the Charge Nurse needs me to do.

Next semester is going to be even crazier than this semester. I will be attending two schools bc my school didn't offer two of the classes I needed. I will be taking Human Development, Composition II, General Chem, Microbiology, and Anatomy & Physiology II. 18 credit hours total- should be blast! Pray that I don't burn out! I will definitely be making the most of my break. I think a trip out of town is in order :)

Chuckle

So I don't have much time to write all the exciting happenings of my life... or the lack thereof, but I do have time to post random videos that made me giggle. My dad thinks it's a set up, but eh, who cares? I thought it was funny. Enjoy!

October Update

Well my blog is turning into a once a month thing, but I figure one post is better than none. Not much blogging perhaps because I don't feel like there is much to report, and also spare time isn't easy to come by these days. Between school and work I stay pretty busy. My classes are going well, I enjoy my job ( most days haha ) and I'm going to start volunteering at the local hospital. I'm beginning to work on nursing school applications. It doesn't feel like reality. While the days seem to creep by, time really is flying. Who knows where I'll be in a year, but I'm hoping for Charleston. I'll be submitting an application to Medical University of South Carolina, Valparaiso University and a couple schools in Portland, Oregon. I'm so excited!!! I'm not sure where the Lord wants me to be, so I'm working on trying to figure that. But I am really really hoping for once His plan is aligned with mine.... but reality is, it probably isn't. Well, whatever it is, I'm definitely going with His plan, and not mine. Seems like the smart thing to do ;)

Well the weather here in NW Indiana has quickly chilled. Can I just say, I HATE the cold. I hate having to get out from under the covers when it's cold. I hate getting into a freezing cold car and touching a freezing cold steering wheel. I hate trudging between buildings to get from class to class and having to endure an ice cold wind that feels like it's cutting at my face. But I suppose the cold does mean snow is coming and this year I've decided would be the year I learn how to ski. Sadly I've never skied before despite living in Utah several winters. Now that I'm in Indiana and have to make an out of the way trip to do some real skiing, I finally decide to do it. Well, it gives me a good excuse to head up to Idaho to visit my Rexburg friends.

As for life in general... I'm doing good. I would never have made it this far if it weren't for all the friends and family I have supporting me. I am learning and growing into the person I've always wanted to be. I've been able to step back and look at my life and recognize weaknesses that have brought so many problems. They were problems that were so deeply rooted and seemed impossible to overcome, and I'm overcoming them one by one. My Savior has been my anchor. With Him the impossible has become possible. I can't properly express my gratitude, but the gospel has changed my life and continues to do so. Sometimes you think life is ending, but often it's just beginning. My new beginning has been a precious gift. It hasn't been easy and I've slipped here and there, but who doesn't? Our Heavenly Father knew we wouldn't be perfect, but He doesn't care about that. What He does care about is that we continue to move forward. And that I can do.

Be Small Enough

Sometimes it's hard to believe that among Heavenly Father's millions of children, He hears me. There are so many crying out for help. How is it possible that I am not just another voice? Lately when I pray, I feel as if I'm talking to nobody. I have been pleading for comfort & strength, but none comes. I am feeling weak. Susceptible & vulnerable.
This does not mean I'm giving up. Though sometimes it seems tempting, I am a fighter. Always have been. I have come too far to stop now. Heavenly Father has blessed me so much in these past months. I have felt His love and embrace like I've never felt it before. It's not easily forgotten. Another fights for my soul. He is real and very powerful, but his power is nothing compared to that of my loving Father. So while I may feel empty and alone right now, I haven't forgotten all that He has done for me.
My Bishop has clearly sensed my discouragement. After institute last night I tried to quietly and quickly leave, but didn't manage to escape soon enough. My Bishop pulled me in his office and in the most loving manner said "Don't give up." In that man's office, I couldn't help but feel my Savior's love. I haven't felt that in weeks, and suddenly sent as a ray of hope was His love delivered through my dear Bishop.
He is still refining me. Success is a part life, but so are failures. How else do we grow and become more like Him? It's such a painful process, but the end result will be worth it. In my opinion the past 6 months of my life has been one big miracle. I'm not even asking for a miracle anymore. I just want to feel Him again.

I Finally Have a Sister!

My brother got married this past weekend. Surprised? Not as much as we were... lol. It is still strange to think about my little brother even being old enough to have a wife. Her name is Sarah and she is incredibly smart and sweet. We share a love for sushi and shopping and of course we both adore my brother Jay. :) Jay and Sarah came to visit labor day weekend, and unfortunately I didn't get as much time as I would've liked to get to know her because of two weddings (one I was in) and work.
I gotta admit, I was slightly unhappy that I wasn't present for their marriage, but after seeing them together I feel better. Watching the newlyweds, I can't decide if I think it's more cute or nauseating. BUT I can tell she really loves my brother, and that is what I care about the most. She would kill me if she knew I posted this picture... but sshhh I trust you'll keep a secret.